Let’s be real: when we hear the word self-care, most of us picture the same Pinterest-worthy scene—a glowing face mask, a bathtub full of petals, a $7 latte, maybe even a silk robe and lo-fi music playing in the background. And don’t get me wrong, all that stuff is lovely. But here’s the thing: self-care isn’t always cute. It isn’t always pretty, and it’s definitely not always Instagrammable.
Sometimes, real self-care looks like doing the uncomfortable stuff. The things no one claps for. The things that don’t fit in a TikTok routine or come with a catchy caption. It’s the version of self-care that doesn’t get talked about as much—but it’s the kind that actually makes a difference.
This is a reminder (maybe one you really need right now): you don’t need a skincare haul to take care of yourself. You need honesty, boundaries, discipline, and yes, a little bit of tough love. So let’s get into it. Here’s a list of self-care habits that aren’t aesthetic, but truly work—and might just change your life.
1. Going to Bed on Time
Let’s start with the most basic (and yet most neglected) one: sleep. No candlelit bath can make up for chronic sleep deprivation. You can’t “serum” your way out of under-eye bags that are really just exhaustion.
Getting 7-8 hours of solid sleep doesn’t look glamorous. It means turning off your phone when everyone else is still scrolling. It means saying no to one more episode. But sleep is where your brain resets, your body heals, and your emotions stabilize. Without it, everything else is just noise.
Want better skin, mood, and focus? Start with sleep. Boring, but powerful.
2. Drinking Water (Even When It’s Not in a Stanley Cup)
We love a cute tumbler. But hydration isn’t about aesthetics—it’s about function. Your body needs water to do literally everything, from regulating temperature to flushing out toxins to keeping your energy levels up.
Real self-care is reaching for water before your third coffee. It’s recognizing that your 2 p.m. slump might not be burnout—it might just be dehydration.
Make it easy: keep a water bottle nearby. Set reminders if you have to. You don’t need to make it a “moment.” Just drink the water.
3. Doing the Dishes When You Don’t Feel Like It
This one’s for the days when everything feels like too much. Your sink is full, your brain is tired, and the idea of cleaning feels laughable. But then you do it. You wash the dishes. You wipe the counters. And somehow, that tiny act of order gives your mind just enough space to breathe.
Sometimes the best self-care isn’t rest—it’s momentum. It’s doing one small thing that reminds you you’re capable, even when life feels messy.
4. Saying “No” Without Explaining Yourself
This one is hard—especially if you’re a people-pleaser. But setting boundaries is self-care. Saying “no” is self-care. You don’t owe anyone your time, your energy, or your peace.
Real self-care is canceling a plan you’re dreading. It’s not answering that call when you know it’ll drain you. It’s choosing your wellbeing over guilt.
And here’s the magic part: the more you do it, the easier it gets.
5. Logging Off and Sitting in Silence
We don’t talk enough about digital burnout. Scrolling doesn’t always relax you—it sometimes just numbs you. And while that feels good in the moment, it usually leaves you more drained afterward.
Unplugging isn’t glamorous. There’s no filter or highlight reel for sitting quietly with your own thoughts. But wow, is it powerful.
Try it: 10 minutes with no screen, no sound, just stillness. It might feel weird at first. But over time, your mind will thank you for the silence.
6. Going to Therapy (or Journaling Honestly)
We love a good journaling session with pastel pens and stickers. But what about the kind where you write the raw, unfiltered stuff? The things that scare you? The truth you’re afraid to say out loud?
Real self-care is getting to know your actual feelings—not just the pretty ones. Whether that’s through therapy, journaling, or a deep talk with someone you trust, facing your inner world is where healing starts.
It’s not always pretty. But it’s always worth it.
7. Moving Your Body (Not for Aesthetics—But for Sanity)
Forget the “summer body” pressure. Exercise isn’t just about how you look. It’s about how you feel. It’s about processing stress, releasing emotion, and getting out of your head.
Maybe it’s a walk around the block. Maybe it’s dancing in your room. Maybe it’s five push-ups next to your bed. You don’t need a gym or a matching workout set. You just need to move.
Consistency matters more than intensity. So start small, and let it build from there.
8. Following a Budget (Even If You’d Rather Not Think About Money)
Financial stress is real, and no amount of bath bombs can make it go away. One of the most loving things you can do for yourself is get honest about money.
That means checking your account, making a simple budget, and spending with intention—even when it’s uncomfortable.
It’s not fun. But it’s freedom. And your future self will thank you so much.
9. Making That Appointment You’ve Been Avoiding
You know the one. The dentist, the doctor, the mental health screening—whatever it is, you’ve been putting it off. Maybe out of fear, maybe out of overwhelm, maybe just because it’s inconvenient.
But here’s the truth: taking care of your health is an act of self-respect. It’s saying, I matter enough to be looked after.
Make the call. Put it on your calendar. Rip the Band-Aid off. You’ll feel lighter instantly.
10. Letting Yourself Feel What You Feel
Real self-care isn’t always about fixing your mood. Sometimes it’s about allowing it.
If you’re sad, let yourself cry. If you’re angry, punch a pillow. If you’re anxious, acknowledge it. The goal isn’t to always be calm—it’s to be real with yourself.
Suppressing emotions isn’t strength. Processing them is. And that takes time, patience, and a lot of kindness.
11. Cleaning Your Space (Even a Little)
There’s something powerful about cleaning your physical environment. It’s not about being perfect or minimalist—it’s about making space to breathe.
You don’t have to deep-clean your whole house. Start with one drawer. One corner. One pile. Watch how your energy shifts.
Sometimes, a clear room leads to a clearer mind.
12. Unfollowing People Who Drain You
Self-care can mean unfollowing, muting, or blocking. Not because you’re mean—but because you’re allowed to protect your peace.
If someone’s content makes you feel less-than, anxious, or just off—let it go. You don’t owe anyone your digital attention.
Curate your feed like you curate your space: with love, honesty, and intention.
13. Eating Meals That Actually Nourish You
This isn’t about dieting or going “clean.” It’s about paying attention to how food makes you feel. Real self-care is feeding yourself enough. Eating regularly. Choosing meals that give you energy instead of zapping it.
Yes, joy and comfort foods matter too. But balance is the goal—not restriction, not chaos.
Feed yourself like you’d feed someone you love.
14. Doing the Boring Stuff (Even If No One Notices)
Filing papers. Paying bills. Organizing files. These aren’t “cute” acts of self-care—but they are powerful. They’re how you build a life that feels manageable and stable.
Real care isn’t about waiting for a breakdown to rest. It’s about doing small, unglamorous things that prevent the breakdown in the first place.
And guess what? That’s brave.
15. Giving Yourself Grace on the Hard Days
Some days, just getting out of bed is a win. And that counts.
Real self-care means dropping the idea that you have to earn rest, that productivity equals worth, or that you always have to “bounce back.” You don’t.
You are allowed to have off days. You are allowed to feel like a mess. And you are still worthy of love and care, exactly as you are.
Ayerhs Magazine 